Finally I decided to stop my cockiness starting from writing things. Honestly it's so hard for me to be this such way. And you can see this is written in English, though. It's really a proof that I can't just simply leave all my pride to be a very strict man and formal, since it feels like noblemen for me and I really love to pretend that way.
I must thank to God, or rather to my Karma and Destiny that successfully lead me to meet so many people in life, so that I can thank to these people because they have helped me to realize many things in life.
I actually must admit that the reason I decided to be this way is because of a friend of mine (let's just say his name: ER). It's not that ER persuaded me to change my style and to stop being cocky (no, it's not that way), but through his writing on his Blog, I finally realized one thing that I actually had known for long: The most beautiful one that human posses is their sincerity and humility.
Well, please don't think that I wrote on my blog not sincerely and without any humility prior to my this writing . It was just that I wrote them with too much pride of myself. Now I think that to say something I wanna really say from my deepest feeling is not something bad. I know it's like grumbling all alone to my own self, but I think it's quite a relief. People sometimes need time to talk alone and write down everything they feel and experience, don't they? I am also a human, after all.
Then what actually did happen to me so I wanna change? Well, people always change, right? Sometimes they even evolve to 'another form' of human. Okay, the answer is: I read his blog. It would not be enough if I only read it once or twice or just a very few times. It actually was times for me to read his writings. Furthermore, it's not only his. Some other people's writings also have made me make up my mind. In short, they all have inspired me through their writings.
I honestly am very afraid about what people may think and say when later they read my this writing. Uhm, you know that in Indonesia where I've been living since I was a fetus there are so many people think that to share something unimportant (especially to write it in network that many living people can read) is so annoying. Because of that I started writing my blog with some rare information so I could prevent some bad thoughts of people about my blog and in order to make them impressed with what I wrote (yes, I'm such a freaky mind).
It's okay for anyone to think I am a dishonest person. It's true, after all. I couldn't even say my true feeling at my first confession in my whole life. It must be the worst confession all over the world. I do really regret it, but now I can do nothing about it. It's so troublesome for me that I can't stop lying, even to myself. Maybe it's because I'm too much afraid of what I have to face in life. It feels like I'm trapped in my dream; I don't wanna grow up and I want to stay still child forever.
Okay, stop the life-sharing please. I only want to declare that I will try my best to start writing things in new way, like story-telling maybe, or like sharing some experience and feelings I have.
Okay, that's all. I hope I will write routinely on this blog.
For readers: just wish me luck. Thank you.
I must thank to God, or rather to my Karma and Destiny that successfully lead me to meet so many people in life, so that I can thank to these people because they have helped me to realize many things in life.
I actually must admit that the reason I decided to be this way is because of a friend of mine (let's just say his name: ER). It's not that ER persuaded me to change my style and to stop being cocky (no, it's not that way), but through his writing on his Blog, I finally realized one thing that I actually had known for long: The most beautiful one that human posses is their sincerity and humility.
Well, please don't think that I wrote on my blog not sincerely and without any humility prior to my this writing . It was just that I wrote them with too much pride of myself. Now I think that to say something I wanna really say from my deepest feeling is not something bad. I know it's like grumbling all alone to my own self, but I think it's quite a relief. People sometimes need time to talk alone and write down everything they feel and experience, don't they? I am also a human, after all.
Then what actually did happen to me so I wanna change? Well, people always change, right? Sometimes they even evolve to 'another form' of human. Okay, the answer is: I read his blog. It would not be enough if I only read it once or twice or just a very few times. It actually was times for me to read his writings. Furthermore, it's not only his. Some other people's writings also have made me make up my mind. In short, they all have inspired me through their writings.
I honestly am very afraid about what people may think and say when later they read my this writing. Uhm, you know that in Indonesia where I've been living since I was a fetus there are so many people think that to share something unimportant (especially to write it in network that many living people can read) is so annoying. Because of that I started writing my blog with some rare information so I could prevent some bad thoughts of people about my blog and in order to make them impressed with what I wrote (yes, I'm such a freaky mind).
It's okay for anyone to think I am a dishonest person. It's true, after all. I couldn't even say my true feeling at my first confession in my whole life. It must be the worst confession all over the world. I do really regret it, but now I can do nothing about it. It's so troublesome for me that I can't stop lying, even to myself. Maybe it's because I'm too much afraid of what I have to face in life. It feels like I'm trapped in my dream; I don't wanna grow up and I want to stay still child forever.
Okay, stop the life-sharing please. I only want to declare that I will try my best to start writing things in new way, like story-telling maybe, or like sharing some experience and feelings I have.
Okay, that's all. I hope I will write routinely on this blog.
For readers: just wish me luck. Thank you.
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