I Bid Thee Adieu, Grandmother

“Good bye may seem forever. Farewell is like the end, but in my heart is the memory and there you will always be.”
― Walt Disney Company

As I've been living my life for 21 years, I can't help but to find changes when I compare my childhood to my current phase of life. By 'changes' I refer to those things used to exist but now no longer do. Things that have been with me since I was born or since I was little, but now have left me. Although many new things came as time went by, but can they replace what I lost? Would they feel the same? Can they cure the pain of great loss I suffer?

I hate it when people tell me to let go. I hate it when people tell me to move on. I hate it when people tell me to stay strong. I hate it when people pretend to be wise facing sorrow. What do they know about my feeling? What do they understand about my grief?

Now and right now, the tears keep falling inside and sometimes it flows out as I've lost a very important person I'm fond of. Everything the person always did to me, nobody will do it the same, or

WHY WE SHOUT IN ANGER

A Hindu saint who was visiting river Ganges to take bath found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled and asked.

'Why do people shout in anger shout at each other?'

Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'

'But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.' asked the saint

Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.

To Children: Don't ever grow up!

Before National Work Plan Meeting AMSA-Indonesia 2013, The Very First National Event Hosted by AMSA-UNS Ever!!

Two and a half years ago, when I entered AMSA-UNS, it was a collapse medical student organisation in campus. almost no member at all.
I decided to join, persuaded some friends to also join, and few months later we participated in AMSA National Event.

Few weeks after, AMSA-UNS had a local event, and in evaluation meeting, we discussed whether to dare hosting national event. We decided: "no, we're not ready yet."

One year then passed. We already gained more members, and on August 2012, we hosted AMSA Exchange Programme, having incoming medical students from AMSA Taiwan.

As in the next process, conflicts happened amongst members. But according to some elders in AMSA-Indonesia, it's a natural and common phenomenon. it's a sign we were progressing to the better phase.

After gaining more members from batch of 2012, we grew bigger, then decided to host national event, for the first time ever for AMSA-UNS. Totally it wasn't easy. It would never be easy. But as for today, we've made it.

Sorry, it's not "we". It's "They've made it". Why "they"? because I didn't help much. I didn't even one who decided to host it. I wasn't even part of the committee. I was even one who doubted that they could make it. But still, I was feeling so excited.

AMSA-Indonesia Again, After Some Old but Broader Drama

Long short, after almost one year, I finally have been involved again in AMSA-Indonesia. Not as Delegate, not as any committee, not as any officer, but as a...well, uhm, I don't even know how to put it. There were some dramas, I was the only one who knew and understood the complete story, the reason why one thing happened and then caused other things, and there I've been like an agent who gathered all information and then distributed it to the authority who needed to decide solutions.

It doesn't stop there. There was this junior, a junior from highschool and also in AMSA (but different university) who asked me to give him advices and knowledge about AMSA-Indonesia because he was a Regional Chairperson Candidate (he lost though). It was like almost every night I spent to have skype chat with him, to teach him a lot of things and to help him answering questions in mailing-list campaign.

When We Are Being Honest

Have you ever tried being profoundly honest to everyone including yourself? Have you ever felt that you are simply so blunt or people tell you so? Or perhaps are you kind of person who is honest and blunt?

Yes, we are taught to be honest, to people and to ourselves. Yes, we can find it in every religious and moral teaching that honesty is important. But then, do we also realize that sometimes, or most of times, people hate honesty? do we realize that we ourselves also fear being honest?

It is when you are within a community, or within an organisation, or within your very own friendship that